I ended up walking out of there is a ‘good’ haircut…however, that’s just an end-result. One well-versed knows…the process is just as important (if not more important) than the end-result.
Warning…dis gone be a longggg review.
I met up with a homie at El Catrin. We met up there because we both needed haircuts and this dumb vato has never went to a reputable barber shop for a haircut. I rock a pomp while he sports a quiff, so lemme describe myself real quick — kinda see whether you (the reader) and I can relate.
I style a clean pompadour every morning — whether or not I’m going out anywhere. I have ZERO interest in any metrosexual quiffs or rockabilly/psychobilly hair cone. I don’t care to revive some long dead time-period…I simply only care to knock off my girl’s underwear with my damn good looks. Alright…now let’s proceed to the review.
When I got there, I had to wait for about 30 minutes. It’s all good. I don’t mind loitering in the streets out front. I had my personal reservations about this place prior to going but my homie insisted. Typically, I prefer a place that uses old-fashioned things because it’s what they first learned to cut with and what they’ve been using for decades — not what they sought out for with great effort at the local antique shop. You know what I mean? I prefer the white/off-white & turquoise old barbershop and the barbers are white-haired. When it was my time, they sent me in and upstairs to what I feared the most, a greenhorn barber. I appreciated that he treated me with respect and shit…but i knew right away that he was new to the game (I ended up finding out he’d been barbering for about 5 years or so…but for a pomp, I’d prefer more experience). When I get a cut from an old-white and experienced barber, he asks me what I want and respond with a few simple sentences, “I need the sides and back cut down. Keep enough length for me to slick it back into a duck ass. I part only on my left side, and can you take an inch off the top?” The idea is that I know what I want to great extent; however, the barber has a better view to apply his personal expertise for the small details. For me, what should have taken only a few seconds…I had to explain and repeat myself over and over for five minutes. I understand he had good intentions of giving me the haircut that I wanted and not make any assumptions — but there is a difference when someone is asking because he/she doesn’t know and is nervous.
When he finally started with my haircut…I could tell he was unsure of how to start. After a minute or so of working up the courage, he asked the more experienced barber next to him whether he should use scissors or clippers…WHAT?! Are you FORREAL!?!?! Put those clippers down and grab that comb & scissors. Not only that, when he really finally started cutting my hair…it was slow. So. Effing. Slow. He would literally isolate a 2” x 2” section of my hair to the point that it was like a tree protruding out of the folded-away grass. Measure for a few minutes and then, finally cut. Lemme tell you…halfway through my haircut, my homie finally went down to get his hair cut. AND I STILL FINISHED AFTER HIM. I could just sense the lack of confidence in my barber’s work. I’m accustomed to the barber literally dancing the waltz with my hair — his comb & scissors cuddling the waist of my hair follicles. But this….this was more like Justin Beiber watching his first porno.
Eventually, the haircut neared its end, and I’m sure the barber had a feeling I was started to get annoyed. Lemme say this though, I am in no ways an asshole of a customer. I don’t make problems, but I will if you fuck with my hair in a way I did not ask for. I didn’t make any problems during my visit. Anyways, the barber had to me look over his work to make sure I approved. (Thank you for making sure…but every like 10 minutes?!?!) Next was a straight-razor to my neck, ears, and sideburns. Good. It was good work — especially around my sideburns. But he knicked me. What? HE EFFING KNICKED ME. WHAT?! Behind my right ear, his hand got lazy and the blade slipped. Yo. I understand I ain’t gunna die from this cut but come on…you’re really gunna try to hide it? Just apologize dude. I’m already effing too tired at this point to even complain. Whatever, I was very happy with my sideburns though.
I wish I had pictures for this last part but…he offered to re-style my hair after my haircut. I figured shit…I’m out of Suavecito so might as well take advantage of this and get some in my hair. Man…HAHAHAHAHA I have no idea what he was doing. He like spent another 15 minutes or so trying to pomp my hair. Like ended up like spiking up the entire front of my hair and trying to bend the tips down…LOLOL this was too entertaining for me to interrupt him. So, I waited until he gave up. And literally re-did my pomp in the time that he turned around, walked to the sink, and washed his hands.
Literally 2 hours and 15 minutes later, I was finally done. And he charged me $18. WTF?! I know that was more than what’s normally charged. But I was done with the place. In the end, I was pleased with the haircut but very upset with the time & money spent. I will likely not be returning — at least not to this particular barber.